When I think about creativity, or the impulses to create, and how there is a certain bravery or cowardice involved, I think of forest fires. You see, my cousins were fire fighters for the Kiowa Tribe of Oklahoma. I love it when they regale me with stories of their adventures and sometimes these are about disaster relief, like following Hurricane Katrina, and other times they are about fighting large forest fires in Colorado or California. They tell me, “If the wind catches the flames and rushes the fire toward you, you have to decide: are you going to run through the flames?”
On the other side of the fire is safety. But you have to have a working knowledge of how fire thinks and the natural elements and maybe even the cosmos.
Creativity is the same, or why we create. I think of this stuff often. Usually in early morning hours when I’m drinking my coffee. But this morning I thought about creativity and how to create strong fiction. I thought about being vulnerable and telling on yourself. This made me think of artists having to face the worst parts of themselves.
I don’t know if this is an act of bravery or an act of cowardice. It seems I’m creative out of survival and in coping with the traumas of life I create. I play with my toys and pretend the world isn’t falling apart. But in that pretend I’m also facing the thing I’m hiding from. As I write or play guitar or paint on canvas or sing a song I have to confront the trauma in order to be my most creative.
For the story to be perfect, I have to be honest about who I am and what I was and who I’m becoming. I have to tell on myself. I have to confront not only those clichéd demons but more importantly my victimhood.
I’m running into the flames, whether out of instinct or awareness, I know on the other side of the flames there’s safety. But is it an act of bravery or cowardice? Am I running into the flames to save myself?
Nonetheless, either way, I create.
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I love this. I feel that in the process of healing, and becoming my true self, uncovering my soul amidst all the debris placed upon it, I have to run into the flames.
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Thank you, Kelly. Let me know if you have any questions. There aren’t a lot of posts, yet, but I’m making progress. Glad we connected.
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Reblogged this on Kelly Griffiths and commented:
When a writer’s thoughts echo my own so completely, I must share. Writing as a confessional is dear to my heart.
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Powerful. Love your voice. I’ll be interested in seeing how it comes out in fiction. Going to check out more of your little space here. 🙂
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Thank you for this timely message – it really stirred my heart.
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Thank you, Colin. I’m glad you enjoyed. Please stop by anytime you wish.
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Some very interesting thoughts to ponder regarding creativity and the deep well from which it sometimes emerges. Thank you for liking my last post.
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Thank you so much. I’ve been looking for some new fiction to throw myself into. I’ll look him up right away.
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I shall. Ben Okri is a Nigerian writer. I’m fairly sure you will like his work.
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Sounds interesting. I’ll have to look for it. Thank you, Petrujviljoen, for stopping by. Please come back often.
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This reminds me of a story by Ben Okri called Astonishing the Gods. In the story there’s a bridge to be crossed. If I remember the gist of the story correctly it was a case of the bridge being created as one walks on – sheer faith – terrifying stuff.
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Reblogged this on uncaged.
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